


Crime Time

by LoMarrow



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Angst, Gen, I also have no real idea how to tag things so like any suggestions are appriciated, Persona 5 Spoilers, Probably the other confidants/characters too, Suicide mention, Time Loop, but for now this is mainly an interest check type situation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-15
Updated: 2017-06-15
Packaged: 2018-11-14 06:46:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11202642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoMarrow/pseuds/LoMarrow
Summary: Under unknown circumstances Akira finds himself reliving his year in Tokyo indefinitely.Either on a set day at the end of his probation or if certain 'game over' conditions are met Akira finds himself back on the train into Shibuya Station. While he can remember the events of the previous year(s) well enough he's gone through the loop so many times he's stopped trying to keep track. Having tried explaining himself to the other Phantom Thieves numerous times in hopes of finding a solution only to eventually find himself back on the train he eventually resigns himself to the endless loop he seems to be caught in.Until, during the end of one of countless loops... something changes.[Mainly an interest check - Full explanation in the notes - Also can you tell I have no idea how to seriously name things? cause I can.]





	Crime Time

**Author's Note:**

> So I've been having some hella motivation problems as of late but the idea not leaving me alone coupled with multiple playthroughs of P5 and it's blasted message has somehow kicked me into gear enough that - for the first time in forever - I've actually written one of my ideas down... 
> 
> So this is by no real means a finished product - I'm not really that good with grammar either (so if this does go anywhere I will probably need a Beta reader and that's a whole 'nother issue of 'i have no idea what I'm doing' to be dealt with later I guess) So sorry about any mistakes or anything like that. 
> 
> There are probably going to be a few odd parenthesis explanations because I originally wrote this with somewhat of a mix of headcanons about the AU in a separate bit that explained them. Instead of trying to mesh all those together I figured for this first chapter/prologue/IC I'd simplify it just a little bit. Sorry if it's a bit jarring

Another year had passed. It was a relatively relaxing one too or at least as relaxing as the situation allowed itself to be. Each palace was finished as soon as possible to minimize distress and even after all of the loops it was still pretty satisfying to shoot a god in the face.

That being said it was over again. Akira pushed the thought to the back of his mind. He didn’t have much time left to enjoy his company. The loop always seemed to end during the drive back home. Although he honestly wouldn’t even call it home anymore. To him it had been literal years since he’d been there. Considering the loop always restarted on the train into Shibuya and ended during the drive out, it was safe to assume at this point he’d probably never see ‘home’ again. Not unless he wanted to try to return during one of the various loops where he skipped out on the whole situation. He knew how to restart the loop if he needed to after all, no matter how gruesome that method was.

Akira was pulled from his thoughts by Ryuji’s voice “Man, It’s weird… All this ain’t feelin’ real to me just yet.” He was sitting forward, leaning over the front seats of the van that Makoto was driving. Eyes trained on the road and ocean beside of it.

“Like, ‘Am I dreaming,’ y’know?”

“I wouldn’t mind that,” Came Yusuke‘s response as he gazed out across the water, his artistic mind probably constructing something that would hope to rival his Hope & Desire painting. Akira’s smile faded slightly as he pushed the nagging thought that no such painting would ever come to fruition considering the circumstances.

Morgana was the one to snap him back to reality this time.

“We’re free to do whatever we want, after all.” The somewhat arrogant tone of Morgana’s voice cut through Akira’s thoughts well enough but didn’t do much in the way of easing the feelings of guilt from bubbling about in the boy’s gut. He wasn’t sure why it was guilt of all things but that was currently the strongest feeling buzzing around his body.

“heh… I guess so,” responded Ryuji as he leaned back into his seat next to Akira. “If you wanna change the world, all you have to do is look at it differently… am I right?” He turned to face Akira with his trademarked goofy grin and pushed his shoulder against their leaders as if prompting the not unusually quiet boy to respond. “and THAT is what ‘aesthetics’ are.”

Akira couldn’t help but grin along with the ever rambunctious blond as he was playfully nudged. “Yeah.” Was really all he could say to him though. It was all he really ever said here. It seemed to satisfy everyone though. Even the members who hadn’t spoken up seemed to relax every so slightly after hearing Akira’s voice. It gave him comfort. Even if the ever present feeling of inevitability sat heavy in his gut he was happy to ignore it and just try to enjoy the small moments he had left.

Looking up he wondered if he should pop open the hatch that sat above him. Ending the run with the wind against his face and his friends giggling surprise as he deftly stood halfway out of the moving van was almost always the best way to go. The alternative being to stay seated and either sit in silence observing everyone or trying to start small talk if his mood was somewhere that allowed such things. His mood was definitely not up for small talk though. Something was eating at him more then it usually was. Which was certainly saying something considering everything. That feeling of guilt had ballooned and for the brief moments he allowed himself to focus squarely on it, it made his entire body feel like someone had just wrapped him in wet wool.

He closed his eyes briefly as if that would help the situation. After his body instinctively tensed at the thought of opening his eyes to that Red Velvet Room (he only ever visited it briefly between each loop. An empty and deathly silent room where his blood felt still in his veins and the weight of what felt like the world freely pressed against his body before, in an instant, he was back on the train to Shibuya) it took a few seconds for his muscles to relax as the sound of the radio and the Van filled his senses.

“Akira? Is something the matter?” The voice was Yuskue’s and the worry that drenched his words only served to make the churning in Akira’s stomach all the worse. “Yeah.” Came his somewhat strained reply, “I just need some air I think.”

Before anyone could even begin to question him, Akira found himself shakily holding himself up against the roof of the van. It seemed Makoto had slowed down a decent amount though. Reasonable considering one of her passengers had just shoot himself out of the roof. He didn’t give it much thought though because it soon became apparent to him that moving so quickly was probably one of the worst things he could have done.

Breathing became difficult for a few almost painful seconds as the mixture of guilt and dread seemed to consume his body. He could hear the worried murmurs and calls of his friends below but responding to them seemed to be something he wasn’t capable of. His mouth was suddenly all to dry as one single question seemed to penetrate his slowly numbing brain. Had this happened before? He couldn’t remember.

He closed his eyes as tightly as he could as a wave of the ever mixing emotions passed through his body. He almost wished that the cycle would end and he’d be greeted with that red room again. As if outright denying his wish instead of the blood stopping pressure of the Red Velvet Room he felt something else. Or rather he stopped feeling something.

From the second he pushed himself through the hatch he’d been feeling the wind against his face. Even through the tremors of whatever was going through his body caused him to press himself against the edge of roof he could still feel it blowing against his face. Now though, now it had stopped. Momentarily he wondered if Makoto had stopped the Van but that only brought on more questions. It also brought on the realization that something else was missing. The sound of the highway, the ocean, the van… it was all silent. He had enough awareness left in him even as more tremors seemed to pass through him to know that he wasn’t standing on his own. He was still leaning against the roof. Even with his eyes shut as tightly as he could keep them, now more out of fear of what would be waiting for him than anything else, he could tell the van was still planted firmly under him.

This was the first time in all the times that he’d been through this that he could remember something changing so drastically without him instigating it. It was terrifying. Any composure he had as Joker was drained from his body with each tremor that seemed to pass through him. Each time his heart seemed to beat the mixed feelings of dread, guilt, and something he couldn’t begin to place pulsed with it. He gritted his teeth and pressed his nails against the hard steel of the van’s roof. The tighter he closed his eyes the sharper the pulses seemed to get. It didn’t take him long to know exactly what his body seemed to be pressing him to do.

He took in as deep a breath as he could under such pressure he braced every bit of his body he still had control over and opened his eyes.

He almost wished he hadn’t. While the pulsing emotion that tore through him seemed to pause, the terror it brought only seemed to grow as he looked on from his perch.

In front of the van, staring him dead in the eye… was him. Him down to every last detail… except one. The Akira that he found himself unable to look away from had a pair of almost sickeningly yellow eyes.

If he wasn’t already halfway to madness the idea of seeing what he assumed was his shadow would have brought him there. The shadow seemed to award Akira’s final acknowledgement with a glare. A glare with a mixture of what could only be described as hatred but also what seemed to be some form of… pity? He didn’t move though. Neither of them did. 

As if in response to the holes the shadows eyes were drilling into him Akira was the first to break eye contact. There was too much truth in those yellow eyes. To much he both understood and also couldn’t seem to comprehend. It gave him a moment to survey his surroundings. He was still standing in the van. From the brief glace he guessed that Makoto was in the beginning process of maybe pulling over. He couldn’t imagine that the display he was putting on was something she’d continue to drive through. Especially with him half out of the roof like he was. Time wasn’t on her side though. In fact it had seemingly abandoned the entire planet. Still, it was different from the Red Room. At least here his blood didn’t seem to stop flowing. Thoughts of that Red Room seemed to spark another realization. His eyes wearily turned towards the ocean. Keeping his shadow in his peripheral stopped being a concern when his eyes fell upon the once blue waters. Crimson waters paused in arching waves stared back at him. Whatever feeling was left in his body that hadn’t been rocked by the tremors and then his shadow seemed to finally give in.

As he gazed onto the red expanse something occurred to him. Something that he wasn’t really sure was a good or bad thing. This did feel familiar. Perhaps not the situation but the feeling. The atmosphere. The realization of why had him half expecting to transform right then and there into his Joker attire. The thought of which sent another awful tremor through him. A response he hadn’t been expecting but one that set off something in him. Maybe it was just the combination of everything that had happened but the emotion that tremor dug up was more anger than anything.

His gaze returned to his shadow’s and while his shadows gaze hadn’t wavered, Akira’s was now one filled with confused anger. The shadows eyes told a tale that the real Akira couldn’t comprehend but also one that looked frighteningly familiar. Even through the hatred it implored his understanding in a way that sent chills through his body. For a short moment something in that gaze gave him pause. The second he tried to think deeper on it though another tremor surged through him. With it brought another surge of anger and as if in indignant refusal to even try to comprehend his shadows gaze, he broke the silence that had coated them both through the encounter.

“Why are you doing this?!” Whether he meant the current situation or the bigger ever looping picture he wasn’t sure and no longer cared.

The shadow’s eyes narrowed and with it came a look more of disappointment than anything else. “You’re pathetic.” Was the only response the shadow gave. It was all he needed to. As the words hit him Akira found the anger draining. He wasn’t sure why but he couldn’t help but agree. Something deeper in his mind that he couldn’t reach seemed to echo the shadows sentiment so strongly that for a brief moment understanding flooded him before it was swallowed up by another tremor that left him more drained than anything else. He rubbed a hand over his face and closed his eyes, fear to far removed from him in this almost sudden state of calm and sighed as heavily as his body would allow.

“Why is this happening?” He sighed after opening his eyes again. The shadows voice seemed to have a similar effect to his own in reality. At least in regards to how it seemed to calm his friends even when nothing was amiss. It had put him in an almost uncomfortable state of calm even though the words he had spit at him were less than kind. Or maybe everything had just caught up with him. Either way he watched his shadow as he asked his question. He didn’t gain any satisfaction when an unsure looked crossed it’s face.

The shadow contemplated for a moment. Unsure and losing some of it’s earlier confidence from the looks of it. Eventually, it refocused it’s gaze and once again looked him square in the eyes. Akira matched the gaze with a calm even he found eerie for the situation.

“One must take responsibility for their actions.”

The almost familiar sound of something shattering interrupted any response Akira might have had. Without so much as a moment to prepare himself he felt the cool breeze back against his face. It almost felt like a slap considering what had just transpired.

With the wind came the sound and as it washed over him so did the dread of facing those in the van below him. The idea that he would be restarting soon didn’t do much to ease that dread either. So he waited. His earlier thought had seemed to be correct as he kept his eyes trained firmly on the road while Makoto eventually found a decent place to pull off to the side. It took enough time to let him breath for a bit. It also gave him a moment to take stock of himself. He still felt eerily calm and while that unsettled a part of him it didn’t show any signs of faltering. The realization he was now coated in sweat was an interesting one but certainly not surprising. It felt like his body had gone through the ringer and the ‘moment’ he had shared with his shadow seemed to last much longer then it actually did but even that was nothing compared to the probable second that passed for his friends.

Once the car stopped he gave himself another second or two before almost falling back into his seat. He felt more drained than anything and judging by the worried looks shared by everyone else in the van he probably didn’t look any better than he felt.

Maybe it was because the seemingly unshakable calmness still clung to him but he could tell something was different. They all looked at him with worry but also something else. Something that none of them, Akira included, really understood. None of them seemed to have any words.

Something in Akira’s head chimed in as if whatever had just happened with his Shadow had unlocked something long lost to him. For the longest time he had thought his adventure had reset itself during the drive home. Whatever rang out in his mind told him something different though. It was difficult to grasp exactly what exactly he was trying to remember. The idea poked and probed against his brain but each time he seemed to grasp onto the idea it slipped right back out of his grasp. All he could really gleam from it without pushing his mind farther then it had space to go was that this wasn’t the end. Another more familiar thought reared it’s head though... It was still going to reset soon. He couldn’t really deny it either. The two thoughts melded into the silence of the van and in that moment he made the most forward decision he’d made in a while.

Whatever happened between now and the reset was something he needed to glimpse. It was all he could hope that he’d remember whatever it was he saw when woke back up on that train. And if he didn’t remember… maybe one of his friends would. There had been too many loops to count where he had tried to tell them all everything. There had been loops where bits and pieces had come back as Deja vu or as ‘phantom’ memories/conversations. He had no real reason to believe that these would be any different. That he would wake up and that somehow everyone would hold onto something that hadn’t technically even happened yet. 

That was the last thing that was going to stop him though. He took one more deep breath before sitting up in his seat and breaking everyone out of there confused stupor. Pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes he readied himself.

“We need to talk…”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> Again this is kinda the first time I've done anything like this and it was written in one big sleep deprived session so I can't expect it to be the best thing ever, certainly.  
> But if anyone wants to talk about it feel free to comment or hit me up on my [Tumblr](https://alphasobek.tumblr.com/). 
> 
> Just to be a downer (also just to be 100% clear I guess) motivation is a problem for me now-a-days, although I'm hoping working on this will help with that, there's still the possibility that if I do continue with this it'll be pretty slow.


End file.
